This entry is in response to the prior comment posted under my prior entry.
Thank you so much for letting the seeds get watered and germinate in your mind into your unique contribution and response :) I'm glad to be having this discussion because I learn lots of things from it and it allows me to expand on my own thoughts on the matter.
It also warms my heart because I too find it so hard to let people live their lives as they are living when I have some food and water that I know works for me that could help them live better. Of course I know that 'better' is unfortunately my own definition and I have lots of proof and evidence to point to that this definition of 'better' is applicable to others.
Its so difficult to watch others suffer. And yes, maybe its just not their season to grow. Maybe they must grow ugly, wither and die, letting go of old growth first and live in the winter of being dormant and without any new movement. Knowing that we each have cycles of growth and cannot be pushed to early spring, to early flowering, to early maturity and early harvest gets the pressure off of us to grow at all costs even when its not time. Some of us want to grow all the time, and in today's culture the Wood element is out of control. We grow all the time, we take no winter, and we don't let go of the past, but grow, faster, faster, and faster, using up all the resources till we're incredibly tired. This is not how nature intended. Nature intended distinct seasons and distinct timing. When we allow ourselves to live in whatever season is appropriate to our growth we can be peaceful, and grow in accordance with time.
Looking at other people's suffering causes us to feel like we want to respond. Its a natural thing, and if we didn't we would become cold and dead ourselves - completely unable to help those in need. Instead of becoming cold and ignoring people's suffering - the way that I think we can respond is to be relevant to what their needs are. Sure, they may not be caring for their basics like food and water, and from our perspective it looks like the most important thing they are missing is food and water. Just like Marshal Rosenberg says in Non Violent Communication - the causes of people's suffering is rooted in unexpressed and unfulfilled needs.
When I try to communicate and bring the water I have and sense resistance - I must know that the resistance isn't about me. Its about them and what their unfulfilled needs are. This should be a wakeup call that I'm not bringing the right food that is needed in this moment. I talked about this in the GIEN conference - be relevant first, and they people open up to whatever message you have. You know the feeling when you are hungry and you still have 2 hours before you will get home? You are ravenous and can't pay attention to anything or anyone, can't listen to the radio, can't concentrate on what everyone else is saying. Your basic needs are screaming to you - I... need... to... eat... now....
Nothing goes in unless our basic hunger is fed first and this is the lesson from Earth. Because of this, and if we learn to recognize the needs to others, we can respond to their suffering without being frustrated that they're not taking in what we think is good for them right now. This is why Non Violent Communication suggests that we need to verify what we thing people's needs are, because we can get it wrong.
Resistance is a mechanism each of us has to anything new that may threaten the balance or introduce something that doesn't fit in with what we need in the present moment. Perhaps the resistance others have towards us and the resistance we have towards others is the source of lessons which will give us peace and ability to be free to be ourselves in any situation.
The nature of Wood is to feel resistance and be frustrated by it. The distinction is whether you make the resistance personal, or just simply something that needs to be broken through for your own growth. Benevolence therefore mediates the discernment between your growth and the growth of others as being on a different trajectory and cycle than your own and knowing that this is as nature designed it. And because nature designed it this way, it should be celebrated.
So when people suffer they may be suffering because they arn't being heard, they have noone to come home to, they are disconnected from their family and friends and feel lonely, they feel unvalued, they feel unnourished by their work and feel stuck and mired in a lifeless routine, they're disconnected from their spirituality, are unable to let go of the past which limits who they believe they can be in the future, they're afraid of making changes in life and being alone, or suffering, or losing themselves in the process. Sometimes they just need a hug, a glance of "I understand you sister, brother". We are all wilting for different reasons and need different food and water in the moment to give us spirit to persist on. And when we're given our immediate needs, be can become far more open to new ideas. If our spirits are safe, secure, nourished, loved, contributing, and alive - we can be more inclined to hear, and have room in our lives to look to other sources of food and water.
Maybe in this life some people are like a cactus that is prickly and ugly on the outside, and is malnourished, and doesn't have abundant food and water holding on to all of its reserves and putting up thorns so that noone gets close to them and takes what they have. Maybe they think that they are unloved, unappreciated, and noone wants to touch them. Perhaps a cactus like that in the office needs a special type of care and needs to bask in the sunshine so that they too can flower in their own way with what God gave them. Maybe their destiny is to be that way and still bring joy and nourishment to others within their own type of self-expression. If don't see that we spend our whole lives fighting against people being who they are, versus fighting for our own cause - and this is exhausting.
The image for benevolence is to imagine yourself growing into this huge 300ft tree like in the movie Avatar. You spread your branches far and wide and then all sorts of life can live within your branches and in your shade. They come to you for what you have to offer because they have needs and see that you can fulfill all their needs. Not just give them fruit and nuts, and dew from your leaves as water - but offer shelter, security, understanding, support, a place to lay their head, and to be themselves in your branches. All the birds, bees, squirrels, and other beasts of the trees then make your branches their nest. Other plants that need less sunshine and need cooler climates can then grow on the floor and they in turn are nourished by the compost of whatever leaves you let go of in the process of yearly renewal.
Being happy and at peace is not ignoring others and being only concerned with your own growth and wellbeing while watching people wilting around you. If you are offering what they need most they will come to you. And if someone else is offer what they need most they will come to them.
If you don't offer safety and security (earth), they will go to someone or something that does.
If you don't offer unconditional love and acceptance of who they are (fire), they will go to someone or something that does.
If you don't offer quality and inspiration (metal), they will go to someone or something that does.
If you don't offer confidence, wisdom and courage (water), they will go to someone, or something that does, and
If you don't offer vision and persistence for what is possible in all realms of body mind and spirit (wood), they will go to someone or something that does.
Its a tall order to have all those virtues and embody them in such a way that they overflow with such abundance that everyone can be nourished by you regardless of each of their individual needs. This is why we were each given talents so that we can nourish those that resonate to our talents. And we can point them to others who have talents we don't if they need something we cannot, or do not offer ourselves. We don't need to be everything for everyone.
If we can grow into the vision of the tall tree, healthy in the body, mind, and spirit, and always looking towards the vision for what is possible in those realms and pursuing it with the even, steady, and cyclical growth of the seasons, then others will come to us looking for what source of nourishment we used to get there and what needs we went after in our lives.
The funny thing about cultivating our individual talent is that by cultivating one, we cultivate all of them. When one element is truly balanced, all the elements come into balance and we end up offering them all. I see this in my Sensei. She has her goal of teaching and using this one form of acupuncture, and that is her own vision. She is also so beautifully benevolent in that she knows that she believes so much in her own work, but knows that this may not necessarily be the way for everybody. Each lecture we get she talks about us finding our true source of water. In her encouraging me to go to Five Element school, and encouraging others to leave her class and do their own thing (one become a publisher, another a videographer, another a musician) that she is giving them the best medicine. She is giving them the right to exist as they were born to be. In being benevolent, she also radiates all the virtues of all the elements.
She said the other day "You all know that I have a temper, and I have been fighting my whole life with my temper and my frustration. Each day when I wake up I pray to God to help me be clean for the day. In between each patient I wash my hands, and it may look to you like I am washing my hands, but to me I may be furious with the patient and frustrated with why they are here again, but in those 30 seconds, it is the alone time I need to wash my hands, my mind, and my spirit so that I can bring in the light of God, the gold light of healing into my being so that it can express itself in the treatment. I am nothing but a hollow insertion tube, and God is the needle. I must polish and clean my insertion tube every day so that nothing obstructs God coming through the insertion tube into the patient."
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Thursday, January 21, 2010
1/21/2010 - Individuation of Wood & Benevolence
Shrubs of Western Hawaii cannot grow in the humid climate of the Eastern side. Likewise the Ferns of Eastern Hawaii cannot grow in the hot and arid climate of the Western slopes. The land and weather dictate the best climate for each plant according to its individual plan. A fern does not grow with the cacti of Arizona. It must grow in the jungle. A cacti cannot grow on top of a mountain. A banana cannot grow in Siberia.
Likewise, we must surround ourselves with the correct climate so that we can express ourselves fully and most authentically. We must be surrounded by people of like mind and spirit if we are to be supported on our path. We cannot grow where we are not meant to. This is why I moved to Colorado to find the medicine of the spirit. I realized that no matter how much I wanted to grow in my path, my surroundings were not supporting my growth. So rather than being a plant trying to grow in concrete, we must all transplant ourselves to the fertile land that nourishes our plan and our personal being. That which is nourishing for some is poison for another. This is why we cannot expect that our plan is the right plan for another.
We are all transplanted by the winds of change as seedlings throughout this world and with short travel time we can be in any new climate, culture and surrounding. Having all this choice is not necessarily the best thing for our spirits because we loose touch with what the most nourishing circumstances that allow us not just to survive, but allow us to thrive! How does Wood show us the difference between surviving and thriving?
Wood also teaches us that each plant grows at its own rate. Each plant also needs different conditions. Some plants grow slowly, some grow quickly. Some plants need volcanic soil, others need clay, others need just the air, while others need rich and loamy compost. Their plan, vision and needs are their own and we cannot judge them based on our plan, our vision and our needs. Their rate of growth is different and their individual needs are different.
In the same way, benevolence is allowing people to be where they are in life because we do not always see what people's plans are or where they are going because we are on our path, and they are on theirs. In a way its not our business. It is of more importance to be concerned with where we as individuals are going, and then helping others reach their own potential if they ask for help. Only when people are ready and willing to receive our ideas will they ask. We cannot force our way on others no matter how much we think we have the right idea. Not all people are ready, and our advice may not necessarily be the most important thing they need at the time.
The problem with being a prophet in our own village is that noone is asking for what we have to give. If they need water, we cannot give them a loaf of bread. And if they're not thirsty, but are hungry, giving them water will only frustrate them. This is why assuming what people need and that we have what they need to 'fix them' never works in our favor and we're like a tree trying to grow in concrete.
Instead we must focus on what we are doing as our own 'play' and then it no longer becomes our job to stand and preach to people about the path to righteousness. That is our path to righteousness. That may not be their path. The image we should go going for is not a preacher, but rather the counselor to whom people come when they are in need. Rather than telling people what to do, we welcome them to come as they are and then if we don't have what they need right now, to just be there with them on their own path. That does not mean to suggest that we shouldn't inspire people and encourage them. What it does mean is that we should not seek to encourage them to be like us.. but encourage them to be authentically who they are. And if part of who what they aspire and envision and dream for themselves is compatible with where they are right now, then we have give them what we have learned. Just like the plant knows when the time is right, we need to know when the person needs sunlight, and when they need water. This can only be done if we pay attention and not come at them with intention.
Our friends job isn't necessarily to agree with us. Its their job to support us in whatever we are doing by allowing us to be ourselves. Their job is not to change to become who we want them to. It is also not their job to change us and make them in their own image. We all walk around in the world trying to make people into our own image. But that is not their destiny. We don't know their destiny. Friends should only help friends express their destiny and not copy or mirror it from us. We're human and we do not have all the answers.
Allowing others the be who they are allows us to rest, be at peace, and be happy and not stress about where other people are going, what people want from us, or that we need to do something for people to like us the way we are. Benevolence allows us to be authentically ourselves, and others to be authentically themselves.
I had a realization last night that just because its possible to be a certain way in life.. it doesn't mean that I have to be that certain way. I must do what fits right for me and not worry about what other people expect of me, or what I expect of other people. Just because its possible to live an enlightened life as a buddhist monk, doesn't mean its the right possibility for me. Just because its possible to be a herbalist, it doesn't mean that its the right possibility for me. Just because its possible to be a nutritionist, a coach, a writer, a preacher, a seminar leader, a singer, a pianist, a cellist, a computer scientist, a nurse, a great swimmer, a great athlete, good at math, having a six-pack, being an astronaut, a underwater basket-weaver - it doesn't mean that its the right possibility for me. Its great that all those things are possible. And I'm glad there are plants growing in the world out there who's authentic self-expression is most alive when they are living their lives fully dedicated to those plans.
Its all possible - but only one plan will be followed according to each plant's nature. That's the lesson of wood. Vision and clarity allow us to see to our depths to see what is authentically our own self expression. For me right now it is the study to be an exceptional acupuncturist and healing physician. I don't have any vision beyond that. I don't need one. I authentically love and am playing at doing this. Where the path will lead after that doesn't matter. Perhaps its not my time to see. Being released from other people's expectations, social stereotypes, images, and other people's molds for what we're each 'supposed' to be, and then freeing myself from my own expectations and my insecurities and need to 'look good' gives me freedom to be me myself. In that I allow others their freedom to be different from me, and have the opportunity to help them get transplanted to the soil in which they will most flourish. This is benevolence.
The beauty of wood is that it has its plan and allows other plants to express themselves. Some express as ugly fruit, some as a venus fly traps, some as vines, some as strawberries, some as grass, and some as orchids. We cannot judge the validity of each type of self-expression. We can only judge whether we esteem to that, or to something else that is more authentic to us. Each has a destiny.
What soil do we need? What temperature? What type of bees to pollinate us? What kind of birds to nest in our branches? What amount of water? What amount of sun? Where do we get our nutrients? How fully and lushly can we express our plans. Benevolence then allows us to view those needs in others and to guide them not to our needs, but to their needs.
Likewise, we must surround ourselves with the correct climate so that we can express ourselves fully and most authentically. We must be surrounded by people of like mind and spirit if we are to be supported on our path. We cannot grow where we are not meant to. This is why I moved to Colorado to find the medicine of the spirit. I realized that no matter how much I wanted to grow in my path, my surroundings were not supporting my growth. So rather than being a plant trying to grow in concrete, we must all transplant ourselves to the fertile land that nourishes our plan and our personal being. That which is nourishing for some is poison for another. This is why we cannot expect that our plan is the right plan for another.
We are all transplanted by the winds of change as seedlings throughout this world and with short travel time we can be in any new climate, culture and surrounding. Having all this choice is not necessarily the best thing for our spirits because we loose touch with what the most nourishing circumstances that allow us not just to survive, but allow us to thrive! How does Wood show us the difference between surviving and thriving?
Wood also teaches us that each plant grows at its own rate. Each plant also needs different conditions. Some plants grow slowly, some grow quickly. Some plants need volcanic soil, others need clay, others need just the air, while others need rich and loamy compost. Their plan, vision and needs are their own and we cannot judge them based on our plan, our vision and our needs. Their rate of growth is different and their individual needs are different.
In the same way, benevolence is allowing people to be where they are in life because we do not always see what people's plans are or where they are going because we are on our path, and they are on theirs. In a way its not our business. It is of more importance to be concerned with where we as individuals are going, and then helping others reach their own potential if they ask for help. Only when people are ready and willing to receive our ideas will they ask. We cannot force our way on others no matter how much we think we have the right idea. Not all people are ready, and our advice may not necessarily be the most important thing they need at the time.
The problem with being a prophet in our own village is that noone is asking for what we have to give. If they need water, we cannot give them a loaf of bread. And if they're not thirsty, but are hungry, giving them water will only frustrate them. This is why assuming what people need and that we have what they need to 'fix them' never works in our favor and we're like a tree trying to grow in concrete.
Instead we must focus on what we are doing as our own 'play' and then it no longer becomes our job to stand and preach to people about the path to righteousness. That is our path to righteousness. That may not be their path. The image we should go going for is not a preacher, but rather the counselor to whom people come when they are in need. Rather than telling people what to do, we welcome them to come as they are and then if we don't have what they need right now, to just be there with them on their own path. That does not mean to suggest that we shouldn't inspire people and encourage them. What it does mean is that we should not seek to encourage them to be like us.. but encourage them to be authentically who they are. And if part of who what they aspire and envision and dream for themselves is compatible with where they are right now, then we have give them what we have learned. Just like the plant knows when the time is right, we need to know when the person needs sunlight, and when they need water. This can only be done if we pay attention and not come at them with intention.
Our friends job isn't necessarily to agree with us. Its their job to support us in whatever we are doing by allowing us to be ourselves. Their job is not to change to become who we want them to. It is also not their job to change us and make them in their own image. We all walk around in the world trying to make people into our own image. But that is not their destiny. We don't know their destiny. Friends should only help friends express their destiny and not copy or mirror it from us. We're human and we do not have all the answers.
Allowing others the be who they are allows us to rest, be at peace, and be happy and not stress about where other people are going, what people want from us, or that we need to do something for people to like us the way we are. Benevolence allows us to be authentically ourselves, and others to be authentically themselves.
I had a realization last night that just because its possible to be a certain way in life.. it doesn't mean that I have to be that certain way. I must do what fits right for me and not worry about what other people expect of me, or what I expect of other people. Just because its possible to live an enlightened life as a buddhist monk, doesn't mean its the right possibility for me. Just because its possible to be a herbalist, it doesn't mean that its the right possibility for me. Just because its possible to be a nutritionist, a coach, a writer, a preacher, a seminar leader, a singer, a pianist, a cellist, a computer scientist, a nurse, a great swimmer, a great athlete, good at math, having a six-pack, being an astronaut, a underwater basket-weaver - it doesn't mean that its the right possibility for me. Its great that all those things are possible. And I'm glad there are plants growing in the world out there who's authentic self-expression is most alive when they are living their lives fully dedicated to those plans.
Its all possible - but only one plan will be followed according to each plant's nature. That's the lesson of wood. Vision and clarity allow us to see to our depths to see what is authentically our own self expression. For me right now it is the study to be an exceptional acupuncturist and healing physician. I don't have any vision beyond that. I don't need one. I authentically love and am playing at doing this. Where the path will lead after that doesn't matter. Perhaps its not my time to see. Being released from other people's expectations, social stereotypes, images, and other people's molds for what we're each 'supposed' to be, and then freeing myself from my own expectations and my insecurities and need to 'look good' gives me freedom to be me myself. In that I allow others their freedom to be different from me, and have the opportunity to help them get transplanted to the soil in which they will most flourish. This is benevolence.
The beauty of wood is that it has its plan and allows other plants to express themselves. Some express as ugly fruit, some as a venus fly traps, some as vines, some as strawberries, some as grass, and some as orchids. We cannot judge the validity of each type of self-expression. We can only judge whether we esteem to that, or to something else that is more authentic to us. Each has a destiny.
What soil do we need? What temperature? What type of bees to pollinate us? What kind of birds to nest in our branches? What amount of water? What amount of sun? Where do we get our nutrients? How fully and lushly can we express our plans. Benevolence then allows us to view those needs in others and to guide them not to our needs, but to their needs.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
1/17/2010 – The Cloud Forest of Kailua-Kona
At the time I went into the Cloud Forest, the clouds had not yet arrived and the forest basked in the brilliant and hot sun. As I climbed up the slopes of Hualalai I become aware to the ways of the trees, vines, grasses and mosses – the children of the Wood element.
Wood seems to be a healthy balance between realism and optimism. The roots each plant creates go as deep as they can to find groundedness in the reality of what the truth of available resources is. Each plant, bush, grass, and moss expresses its creativity to the extent of water’s availability. Their downward growth towards resources is proportional to upwards growth. They generally do not attempt to extend past reality, but are still hopeful for their future.
Wood is the intermediary between the depths of Water and the heights of Fire – between potential, and manifestation. The unification of Heaven and Earth is in the plan of the tree.
Wood in all of its multitude of expressions is the embodiment of trying out different ideas in life. For what purpose, I don’t know, but to manifest potential. In the cycle of creation the trees celebrate each cycle of growth by flowering, and saying “Yes, we did it!”. As the season continues they let go of the structures they used to get there (old branches and leaves) and they rest before taking their next spurt of growth. Why do trees do that? Perhaps it’s just to see if they can.
This “Can it be done”, “Yes, it can”, “No it can’t” is the difference between hope and despair. So, what is the purpose of hope? Fundamentally it is the belief that “It’s better over there than it is over here”. Its that same game of sights directed towards the future. So, what is the purpose of this game? Perhaps it is to escape the sea of potential, and actually pull the potential out of slumber and manifest it in reality, for its own sake. Wood’s ‘in order to’ is to manifest full potential. That is the only ‘in order to’. So this is why wood constitutional types strive for their own goals, towards their own ideas, and then call others, giving them that inspiration through the dedication to their aspiration – to show that it can be done. Wood is the exclamation to the exclamation point! “Look what I can do! Look what can be done!”
Unlike the excitement of the fire element, Wood’s excitement is exuberance in stretching out in all directions, into the new and the unknown – but with a plan!
Plants don’t compare themselves to another because they know that their plans are valid expressions of their inner contribution to the world. They don’t compare who’s got the most colorful bloom, or glossy leaves, or tallest branches. Issues of self-esteem arise out of comparison of oneself to another and “Look what they have done with their resources, and I don’t have those resources, I’m not good enough, I don’t have enough to manifest my plan. I am weak. They are strong.” Just like each type of fern, each tree, each vine, and each sapling has a right to shout “I live. I’m here. I have a plan” - Self-esteem is therefore finding your place in the world as a unique contribution, as the fulfillment of what you have to offer, as a fulfillment of your particular form of self-expression and the claiming of your own self-expression as valid, necessary and needed in this world.
This is distinct from self-worth, and valuing what you find when you examine yourself – which is a Metal quality. The way that Metal controls wood is by saying what is or is not valuable in terms of growth. Which branches are necessary, and which will lead you to spread your resources too thin. Where its appropriate to diversify, and where its appropriate to specialize. What steps in growth are essential, and what are inessential. What is the best, what is not the best. It’s the ability to then sort through all those decisions and all those plans and say “This is a worthy pursuit. This is a good path to take along my journey. This is a good expression of my planning, my decision making and my potential and this is not”. The dictionary defines self-esteem as the valuation and appraisal of your own self-worth. In this instance it is the distinction between having the vision to see that you have a unique self-expression that should be manifested, what is your unique contribution is versus putting value in that. One has to first see what one’s potential is before one can ‘evaluate’ and declare self-worth.
As the sprout breaks through the ground and the vines push through and up against obstacles so does wood break through what it needs to in order to manifest its potential. No wonder then that anger is the primary emotion associated with the wood element. Anger is nothing more than frustrated growth and the energy of upward pushing towards a destination. When something stands in your way that energy of frustration is what shows up. The lesson from the tree in how to deal with anger is to be flexible and move with ease around the obstacle, bending where appropriate and not taking these frustrations personally.
Wood can only accomplish what it desires to by facing everything and avoiding nothing – by not hiding, by not cowering from its potential, by not hiding from difficult conversations, by hiding from tough decisions, by not resigning itself to its circumstances – but facing what it needs to face to break through whatever obstacles it needs to break through in order to manifest its plan. Woods must do this either in reaching down for resources, money, people, skills – or reaching up to manifest its vision regardless of what stands in its way.
Like plants living above the cloud line where they rarely get enough rain, their root systems shallow, barely able to scrounge water – Wood must make its plans in accordance with available resources. Wood will grow full and lush, or it will grow short and stubby. This growth is proportional to its resources and wise decision making. Its plans must be appropriate to the environment. If you are to be scorched by the sun, your leaves should be thicker, darker and more concerned with conservation of water, your branches and leaves fewer.
Above the cloud line, the wood here is dry, inflexible, brittle, undernourished, hard, gray, lifeless, depressed, skeleton-like. The trees and shrubs here are dried up, burned by the sun and have chosen to grow in areas where resources are scarce. When wood extends beyond its means, it dries up and it gets burnt. Poor planning, circumstances, and bad decisions can put it out of reach of these resources. Instead of being supple and flexible, the trees become hard and brittle and that much more frustrated by their lot. Just as the forest thins and growth becomes sparse, Wood’s single-minded pursuit of growth regardless of whether there are enough resources can leave then alone, without friends, and without resources. When all its plans are for naught, all the carcasses of wood’s former plans lay bleaching in the hot sun.
When wood as a parasite overtakes another tree, it uses the growth of others to piggy back its own growth. Wood is so forceful and self-directing, that it must manifest at all costs. And because of this need to manifest it has all these strategies in order to conquer, subdue, break through, beat through, shout over the top of, talk at and overcome another’s point of view. Convinced its path is the only righteous path, it ruthlessly conquers all, in single-minded tunnel vision.
When looking at the majestic and tall tree as compared with a vine, it seems that the majestic tree has stability and self-confidence. The mighty tree doesn’t need anybody’s help. They’re good enough on their own, they have strong trunks, strong bark, and thick stable roots. These trees aren’t as rushed to manifest their plans, because for them stability and planning for the future is more important than fast growth. The vines, however are weaker. They want to grow fast, they need support, they need to manifest quicker – so they climb on the backs of others. Flexible, quick, ravenous in their growth, they accomplish their plans and grow overnight.
When wood wishes to accomplish something is has available to it the ferocity of overnight growth. It can grow out of control and choke others. Alternatively, it may be wise in its utilization of resources and plan wisely for the future so as to survive many many years, and not just into the next season.
When wood charges ahead in a state of blind self-righteousness it overtakes and grows on top of the right to be and plans of others. Because it must manifest its vision at all costs, regardless of what life another plant may have planned, they’re shouting “Me first” and are unable to offer any benevolence for others. Lacking perspective of how their plans damage their relationships with their friends, family, and neighbors they force their way past other people’s ideas to manifest their plan. Other people have their own plans and wish to grow unencumbered. Benevolence is therefore the virtue for wood to cultivate – to have perspective that other people’s plans are valid expressions of their own ideas, and no better or worse than one’s own. Each plant must reach for the sun in its own way. Benevolence encourages all to manifest their own potential without choking the plans of others because of one’s own will, purpose and way of doing things. Perspective is therefore the virtue of seeing how your plans impact the lives of others, as well as the notion that your idea may not necessarily be the only valid idea but that others’ ideas are just as valid. Perspective allows us to plan properly and in full light of circumstances so that we can make wise course corrections in our plans rather than single-mindedly pursue our ideas with blind impunity.
I picked wild lilikoi (passion fruit) from the vines that covered the many trees of the Cloud Forest. Delicious, juicy, and fragrant, the barren forest was still abundant in the results of the vine’s plans. When a plant gives birth to fruit and seeds, it seems to speak “I liked that plan. I liked that idea. I want future generations to follow that same plan and idea and maybe make it better.” Its because of this that it puts so much effort into creating fruit, ensuring that its plan passes on.
Grass is still green in the cloud line but above the cloud line everything is scorched from the sun and what little water is there makes the vegetation dry and hard and burnt. Here its more lush and the clouds move quickly, depositing their moisture, running from place to place infusing the place with just enough resources to continue. I do not know if this is metal condensing water or whether it’s the earth creating a humid, languid, moist, enveloping, opulent, nourishing, mothering cloud. A future trip here may reveal to me the secrets of the Earth and Metal elements.
Wood seems to be a healthy balance between realism and optimism. The roots each plant creates go as deep as they can to find groundedness in the reality of what the truth of available resources is. Each plant, bush, grass, and moss expresses its creativity to the extent of water’s availability. Their downward growth towards resources is proportional to upwards growth. They generally do not attempt to extend past reality, but are still hopeful for their future.
Wood is the intermediary between the depths of Water and the heights of Fire – between potential, and manifestation. The unification of Heaven and Earth is in the plan of the tree.
Wood in all of its multitude of expressions is the embodiment of trying out different ideas in life. For what purpose, I don’t know, but to manifest potential. In the cycle of creation the trees celebrate each cycle of growth by flowering, and saying “Yes, we did it!”. As the season continues they let go of the structures they used to get there (old branches and leaves) and they rest before taking their next spurt of growth. Why do trees do that? Perhaps it’s just to see if they can.
This “Can it be done”, “Yes, it can”, “No it can’t” is the difference between hope and despair. So, what is the purpose of hope? Fundamentally it is the belief that “It’s better over there than it is over here”. Its that same game of sights directed towards the future. So, what is the purpose of this game? Perhaps it is to escape the sea of potential, and actually pull the potential out of slumber and manifest it in reality, for its own sake. Wood’s ‘in order to’ is to manifest full potential. That is the only ‘in order to’. So this is why wood constitutional types strive for their own goals, towards their own ideas, and then call others, giving them that inspiration through the dedication to their aspiration – to show that it can be done. Wood is the exclamation to the exclamation point! “Look what I can do! Look what can be done!”
Unlike the excitement of the fire element, Wood’s excitement is exuberance in stretching out in all directions, into the new and the unknown – but with a plan!
Plants don’t compare themselves to another because they know that their plans are valid expressions of their inner contribution to the world. They don’t compare who’s got the most colorful bloom, or glossy leaves, or tallest branches. Issues of self-esteem arise out of comparison of oneself to another and “Look what they have done with their resources, and I don’t have those resources, I’m not good enough, I don’t have enough to manifest my plan. I am weak. They are strong.” Just like each type of fern, each tree, each vine, and each sapling has a right to shout “I live. I’m here. I have a plan” - Self-esteem is therefore finding your place in the world as a unique contribution, as the fulfillment of what you have to offer, as a fulfillment of your particular form of self-expression and the claiming of your own self-expression as valid, necessary and needed in this world.
This is distinct from self-worth, and valuing what you find when you examine yourself – which is a Metal quality. The way that Metal controls wood is by saying what is or is not valuable in terms of growth. Which branches are necessary, and which will lead you to spread your resources too thin. Where its appropriate to diversify, and where its appropriate to specialize. What steps in growth are essential, and what are inessential. What is the best, what is not the best. It’s the ability to then sort through all those decisions and all those plans and say “This is a worthy pursuit. This is a good path to take along my journey. This is a good expression of my planning, my decision making and my potential and this is not”. The dictionary defines self-esteem as the valuation and appraisal of your own self-worth. In this instance it is the distinction between having the vision to see that you have a unique self-expression that should be manifested, what is your unique contribution is versus putting value in that. One has to first see what one’s potential is before one can ‘evaluate’ and declare self-worth.
As the sprout breaks through the ground and the vines push through and up against obstacles so does wood break through what it needs to in order to manifest its potential. No wonder then that anger is the primary emotion associated with the wood element. Anger is nothing more than frustrated growth and the energy of upward pushing towards a destination. When something stands in your way that energy of frustration is what shows up. The lesson from the tree in how to deal with anger is to be flexible and move with ease around the obstacle, bending where appropriate and not taking these frustrations personally.
Wood can only accomplish what it desires to by facing everything and avoiding nothing – by not hiding, by not cowering from its potential, by not hiding from difficult conversations, by hiding from tough decisions, by not resigning itself to its circumstances – but facing what it needs to face to break through whatever obstacles it needs to break through in order to manifest its plan. Woods must do this either in reaching down for resources, money, people, skills – or reaching up to manifest its vision regardless of what stands in its way.
Like plants living above the cloud line where they rarely get enough rain, their root systems shallow, barely able to scrounge water – Wood must make its plans in accordance with available resources. Wood will grow full and lush, or it will grow short and stubby. This growth is proportional to its resources and wise decision making. Its plans must be appropriate to the environment. If you are to be scorched by the sun, your leaves should be thicker, darker and more concerned with conservation of water, your branches and leaves fewer.
Above the cloud line, the wood here is dry, inflexible, brittle, undernourished, hard, gray, lifeless, depressed, skeleton-like. The trees and shrubs here are dried up, burned by the sun and have chosen to grow in areas where resources are scarce. When wood extends beyond its means, it dries up and it gets burnt. Poor planning, circumstances, and bad decisions can put it out of reach of these resources. Instead of being supple and flexible, the trees become hard and brittle and that much more frustrated by their lot. Just as the forest thins and growth becomes sparse, Wood’s single-minded pursuit of growth regardless of whether there are enough resources can leave then alone, without friends, and without resources. When all its plans are for naught, all the carcasses of wood’s former plans lay bleaching in the hot sun.
When wood as a parasite overtakes another tree, it uses the growth of others to piggy back its own growth. Wood is so forceful and self-directing, that it must manifest at all costs. And because of this need to manifest it has all these strategies in order to conquer, subdue, break through, beat through, shout over the top of, talk at and overcome another’s point of view. Convinced its path is the only righteous path, it ruthlessly conquers all, in single-minded tunnel vision.
When looking at the majestic and tall tree as compared with a vine, it seems that the majestic tree has stability and self-confidence. The mighty tree doesn’t need anybody’s help. They’re good enough on their own, they have strong trunks, strong bark, and thick stable roots. These trees aren’t as rushed to manifest their plans, because for them stability and planning for the future is more important than fast growth. The vines, however are weaker. They want to grow fast, they need support, they need to manifest quicker – so they climb on the backs of others. Flexible, quick, ravenous in their growth, they accomplish their plans and grow overnight.
When wood wishes to accomplish something is has available to it the ferocity of overnight growth. It can grow out of control and choke others. Alternatively, it may be wise in its utilization of resources and plan wisely for the future so as to survive many many years, and not just into the next season.
When wood charges ahead in a state of blind self-righteousness it overtakes and grows on top of the right to be and plans of others. Because it must manifest its vision at all costs, regardless of what life another plant may have planned, they’re shouting “Me first” and are unable to offer any benevolence for others. Lacking perspective of how their plans damage their relationships with their friends, family, and neighbors they force their way past other people’s ideas to manifest their plan. Other people have their own plans and wish to grow unencumbered. Benevolence is therefore the virtue for wood to cultivate – to have perspective that other people’s plans are valid expressions of their own ideas, and no better or worse than one’s own. Each plant must reach for the sun in its own way. Benevolence encourages all to manifest their own potential without choking the plans of others because of one’s own will, purpose and way of doing things. Perspective is therefore the virtue of seeing how your plans impact the lives of others, as well as the notion that your idea may not necessarily be the only valid idea but that others’ ideas are just as valid. Perspective allows us to plan properly and in full light of circumstances so that we can make wise course corrections in our plans rather than single-mindedly pursue our ideas with blind impunity.
I picked wild lilikoi (passion fruit) from the vines that covered the many trees of the Cloud Forest. Delicious, juicy, and fragrant, the barren forest was still abundant in the results of the vine’s plans. When a plant gives birth to fruit and seeds, it seems to speak “I liked that plan. I liked that idea. I want future generations to follow that same plan and idea and maybe make it better.” Its because of this that it puts so much effort into creating fruit, ensuring that its plan passes on.
Grass is still green in the cloud line but above the cloud line everything is scorched from the sun and what little water is there makes the vegetation dry and hard and burnt. Here its more lush and the clouds move quickly, depositing their moisture, running from place to place infusing the place with just enough resources to continue. I do not know if this is metal condensing water or whether it’s the earth creating a humid, languid, moist, enveloping, opulent, nourishing, mothering cloud. A future trip here may reveal to me the secrets of the Earth and Metal elements.
Friday, January 15, 2010
1/15/2010 – Cultural Spirit of Aloha
Kona is awash with flowers. The Winter here is extremely subtle and the land is constantly producing new growth, flowers and an abundance of fruit. As the pink and red flowers float in the breeze it evokes a sense of laughter in me as the full showiness of the island occurs all around me.
I’m reminded of one of the tradition that exists here between families. When you come over to someone’s house you bring some flowers or fruit from your yard. The land around my house while I lived here produced lemons, limes, oranges, tangerines, persimmons and avocados. Bananas grew in the neighbor’s yard and he’d decorate his banana trees with Christmas lights when that time of year came around.
We always had an abundance of fruit on the table outside our classroom which was brought by various students from their own houses when the land produced more than they could possibly eat themselves.
The land produces a huge abundance and people share fruit and vegetables with every opportunity. The generosity of the culture here reflects the generosity of the land. People will do anything for you when asked because everyone looks after everybody else. Many people rely on other drivers to hitchhike to other places for nothing more than a smile and friendly conversation. Passion fruit fall and litter the roads from town to town and many a hitchhiker can score a meal off the side of the road without any trouble. People exchange favors, open their homes, their fridges and their hearts to anyone in need.
When I first stayed on island a year ago I stayed at a bed and breakfast which was surrounded by fruit trees. The sickly smell of rotting fruit and avocados lingered in the air on the property. The owner insisted on my eating as much as I could as bushels of avocados sat uneaten by the laundry room. She could never give all the fruit away and her insistence felt pushy and evoked a sense of fullness simply by looking at the amount of food available.
As the island is sympathetic to its residents’ needs, the residents’ are sympathetic to one another. There is a sense of deep concern that people have for one another. There is a lilting, melodic, and rhythmically punctuated tone to the Hawaiian language and the opulence and sensuality of hula are indicative of the fullness of expression present in the culture. Everyone is an auntie and uncle to the children regardless of blood relation. Warmth, hugs and mutual concern predominate all exchanges. There is great gratitude that predominates the islands and this energy wakes everybody up to be present to the blessings of life, to forgo the future, and forgo the past, living fully in the present.
This Earth energy, nourished by the Fires that create, purity and warm the land create the most abundant and full Earth spirit. This is the fulfillment of the Spirit of Aloha:
When we are full, nourished, and have more than we need, our giving becomes abundant and filled with joy and gratitude. There is nowhere to go, nowhere to be, we are content, full, and present with each other and for each other, in the now. This Earth energy is abundant in cultures that live closer to the tropics and the equator – the geographic and homeostatic center associated with the Earth Element.
I’m reminded of one of the tradition that exists here between families. When you come over to someone’s house you bring some flowers or fruit from your yard. The land around my house while I lived here produced lemons, limes, oranges, tangerines, persimmons and avocados. Bananas grew in the neighbor’s yard and he’d decorate his banana trees with Christmas lights when that time of year came around.
We always had an abundance of fruit on the table outside our classroom which was brought by various students from their own houses when the land produced more than they could possibly eat themselves.
The land produces a huge abundance and people share fruit and vegetables with every opportunity. The generosity of the culture here reflects the generosity of the land. People will do anything for you when asked because everyone looks after everybody else. Many people rely on other drivers to hitchhike to other places for nothing more than a smile and friendly conversation. Passion fruit fall and litter the roads from town to town and many a hitchhiker can score a meal off the side of the road without any trouble. People exchange favors, open their homes, their fridges and their hearts to anyone in need.
When I first stayed on island a year ago I stayed at a bed and breakfast which was surrounded by fruit trees. The sickly smell of rotting fruit and avocados lingered in the air on the property. The owner insisted on my eating as much as I could as bushels of avocados sat uneaten by the laundry room. She could never give all the fruit away and her insistence felt pushy and evoked a sense of fullness simply by looking at the amount of food available.
As the island is sympathetic to its residents’ needs, the residents’ are sympathetic to one another. There is a sense of deep concern that people have for one another. There is a lilting, melodic, and rhythmically punctuated tone to the Hawaiian language and the opulence and sensuality of hula are indicative of the fullness of expression present in the culture. Everyone is an auntie and uncle to the children regardless of blood relation. Warmth, hugs and mutual concern predominate all exchanges. There is great gratitude that predominates the islands and this energy wakes everybody up to be present to the blessings of life, to forgo the future, and forgo the past, living fully in the present.
This Earth energy, nourished by the Fires that create, purity and warm the land create the most abundant and full Earth spirit. This is the fulfillment of the Spirit of Aloha:
You have probably heard about Hawaii’s “Aloha Spirit,” but what is it exactly? In the Hawaiian language, “aloha“ may mean love, affection, compassion, mercy, sympathy, pity, kindness or grace. These sentiments make it a lovely common greeting and expression of farewell. The idea of aloha is so important in Hawaii that the “Aloha Spirit” is even part of State law. The statute reads in part:
“Aloha Spirit” is the coordination of mind and heart within each person. It brings each person to the self. Each person must think and emote good feelings to others. In the contemplation and presence of the life force, “Aloha,” the following unuhi laula loa may be used:
Akahai, kindness to be expressed with tenderness;
Lokahi, unity, to be expressed with harmony;
Oluolu, agreeableness, to be expressed with pleasantness;
Haahaa, humility, to be expressed with modesty;
Ahonui, patience, to be expressed with perseverance.
These are traits of character that express the charm, warmth and sincerity of Hawaii’s people. It was the working philosophy of native Hawaiians and was presented as a gift to the people of Hawaii.
“Aloha” is more than a word of greeting or farewell or a salutation. “Aloha” means mutual regard and affection and extends warmth in caring with no obligation in return.
“Aloha” is the essence of relationships in which each person is important to every other person for collective existence.
“Aloha” means to hear what is not said, to see what cannot be seen and to know the unknowable.
In exercising their power on behalf of the people and in fulfillment of their responsibilities, obligations and service to the people, the legislative, executive and judicial branches of government may contemplate and reside with the life force and give consideration to the “Aloha Spirit.”
We hope you will embrace the spirit of aloha in your everyday lives; for it is not a gift only for those who visit our beautiful island, it is a gift which can be shared throughout the world.
When we are full, nourished, and have more than we need, our giving becomes abundant and filled with joy and gratitude. There is nowhere to go, nowhere to be, we are content, full, and present with each other and for each other, in the now. This Earth energy is abundant in cultures that live closer to the tropics and the equator – the geographic and homeostatic center associated with the Earth Element.
1/12/10 – Motion of the Ocean
The wave gathers strength and through its will it picks itself up and crests in a white plume as the full strength of its force uproots its potential and pummels the surface with a groaning roar. It communicates two types of energy. The white frenetic crest of the wave is the nervous and overflowing recklessness of bladder energy, while its body and massive potential that fuels its curled expression is the kidney energy of deep strength of willful reserves.
The water recedes back and knows when to retreat and amass its strength before advancing with unstoppable force towards its inevitable destination of flowing at, against and around whatever obstacle lies before it. As the waves crash against the shore, I’m reminded of how all planned motion in any particular direction must have proper timing, proper conservation and gathering of resources, and non-hesitant forward motion to complete any change cycle.
Any task I undertake I must know when to retreat and gather in my resources so that when the time is right to exercise my will, I know that I have what it takes to do it. If the waves gather too early, they crash and fizzle their energy against the water and disperse in every direction, but if they wait until they are closer to shore, they can conquer all.
I know a woman who is unrelenting in her pursuits. If she needs money, she will go and ask for a contribution from everyone she meets. If she gets a no in response, it doesn’t matter. Unfazed, she retreats, and then confronts the next person, and the next, and the next, until she’s completed her task. Unrelenting as the sea, she’s ruthless in her pursuit, but does not make it personally when someone says no. She just simply moves on to the next person. She does this will all the pursuits in her life. Flowing around obstacles… she persists… on… and on…
The water recedes back and knows when to retreat and amass its strength before advancing with unstoppable force towards its inevitable destination of flowing at, against and around whatever obstacle lies before it. As the waves crash against the shore, I’m reminded of how all planned motion in any particular direction must have proper timing, proper conservation and gathering of resources, and non-hesitant forward motion to complete any change cycle.
Any task I undertake I must know when to retreat and gather in my resources so that when the time is right to exercise my will, I know that I have what it takes to do it. If the waves gather too early, they crash and fizzle their energy against the water and disperse in every direction, but if they wait until they are closer to shore, they can conquer all.
I know a woman who is unrelenting in her pursuits. If she needs money, she will go and ask for a contribution from everyone she meets. If she gets a no in response, it doesn’t matter. Unfazed, she retreats, and then confronts the next person, and the next, and the next, until she’s completed her task. Unrelenting as the sea, she’s ruthless in her pursuit, but does not make it personally when someone says no. She just simply moves on to the next person. She does this will all the pursuits in her life. Flowing around obstacles… she persists… on… and on…
1/10/10 – Clarifying Powers of Water
I was talking with a visitor here about why I moved from Hawaii to Colorado and how I found I prefer the mountains to the sea. The conclusion was that I find that the mountains offer a future-oriented contemplation towards higher aspirations and possibilities as embodied through the virtue of inspiration. The sea, on the other hands focuses one to perform deep past-oriented introspection into the depths of one’s being by examining what lurks beneath and what is most important to survival.
Perhaps what I find so compelling about the mountains is that they do not force me to still my mind and look deeply at the places that scare me, but give me an opportunity to look up and towards the future I’m committed to, unencumbered by the heaviness and significance of past decisions. The dynamic between my future being an empty canvas onto which to paint a created life, versus a sea of prior completed works which indicate one’s former patterns representing the sea of the past.
The two years of experimentation with sex, drugs, and rock’n roll when I lived in California in my early 20s taught me what I did not want out of life. I moved back to Maryland with that new knowledge and fell into a life with the absence of those things – but with presence of little else. After 8 years of finding myself in a career that was not satisfying I moved to Hawaii to pursue a degree in Chinese Medicine. It took 10 years of floundering around in my life in a miserable and non-contemplative state for me to break free from the stagnation my life had become in Maryland. While in Hawaii, the island turned me inside out and had me stare intently at the places that scared me. In that year, for the first time in my life, the contemplative power of the sea taught me what I did want out of life. That gift of self-knowledge give me a new vision of what I needed to create for myself so that I can be best supported in my quest to be of service to others.
The year in Hawaii was the loneliest and most isolated I felt since early childhood. When I moved to Hawaii I had left my family, my friends, my career, source of income and let go into the waters of the unknown life with only a hope that I was doing the right thing. I was alone on a rock in the middle of nowhere studying a style of medicine that did not speak to my spirit and a group of people that didn’t really bond. Uninspired, I encountered very few people that shared my love for the divine in this medicine. Grieving for a loss of my former life and unable to let go fully I developed terrible fatigue and depression accompanied by shortness of breath and bad reactions to volcanic smog pollution from Hawaii’s volcano. I attempted to piece a new life together by getting involved with a local classical music group and give myself a practice for adding inspiration back into my life while struggling with the decision whether I should remain on the island and continue studying this uninspiring medicine or leave.
The sea clarified for me what I did need out of life. I needed to pursue Five Element medicine, because it was in this medicine that I found inspiration and spirit. I also needed a community of support as most of my former friendships and relationships stopped being relevant to the person I was becoming. I needed a cooler climate, expansive vistas, clear streams, and a clearly delineated autumn season. The school in the mile high state of Colorado held a deep presence of the metal element in its most grand expression of the Mountain scape. Newly inspired – my life on the Island became enjoyable again. I loved each day. The familiar beaches, forests, and vistas which had been my prison for 8 months became instead a wonderland of restful and joyful abundance. I once again could enjoy Hawaii for its primitive and untarnished beauty. With the promise of a new possibility, the knowledge of what I needed, and a new found wisdom in what was necessary to attain it, I was renewed and capable and made the move.
Since that time my life has turned more vital, awake, filled with newness and motivation. Since moving to Colorado I’ve been hiking, going to the gym, studying, making new friends and contacts, and thoroughly enjoying the mountains with the freshly awed eyes of a newborn each time I lay eyes on them. I have found my home and the community I need to support me in the years to come. Renewed, the Metal element lets go of the past, enables a symbolic death and the rebirth through the infinite sea of potential found in the water element to a new, inspired and joyful life.
I have found a place that supports my deficient Metal element and brings me back towards a more centered space. Now that I’m back in Kona sitting under a kukui nut tree on the beach looking at the roiling waves before me, I’m curious what new knowledge and wisdom my time here will offer…
Perhaps what I find so compelling about the mountains is that they do not force me to still my mind and look deeply at the places that scare me, but give me an opportunity to look up and towards the future I’m committed to, unencumbered by the heaviness and significance of past decisions. The dynamic between my future being an empty canvas onto which to paint a created life, versus a sea of prior completed works which indicate one’s former patterns representing the sea of the past.
The two years of experimentation with sex, drugs, and rock’n roll when I lived in California in my early 20s taught me what I did not want out of life. I moved back to Maryland with that new knowledge and fell into a life with the absence of those things – but with presence of little else. After 8 years of finding myself in a career that was not satisfying I moved to Hawaii to pursue a degree in Chinese Medicine. It took 10 years of floundering around in my life in a miserable and non-contemplative state for me to break free from the stagnation my life had become in Maryland. While in Hawaii, the island turned me inside out and had me stare intently at the places that scared me. In that year, for the first time in my life, the contemplative power of the sea taught me what I did want out of life. That gift of self-knowledge give me a new vision of what I needed to create for myself so that I can be best supported in my quest to be of service to others.
The year in Hawaii was the loneliest and most isolated I felt since early childhood. When I moved to Hawaii I had left my family, my friends, my career, source of income and let go into the waters of the unknown life with only a hope that I was doing the right thing. I was alone on a rock in the middle of nowhere studying a style of medicine that did not speak to my spirit and a group of people that didn’t really bond. Uninspired, I encountered very few people that shared my love for the divine in this medicine. Grieving for a loss of my former life and unable to let go fully I developed terrible fatigue and depression accompanied by shortness of breath and bad reactions to volcanic smog pollution from Hawaii’s volcano. I attempted to piece a new life together by getting involved with a local classical music group and give myself a practice for adding inspiration back into my life while struggling with the decision whether I should remain on the island and continue studying this uninspiring medicine or leave.
The sea clarified for me what I did need out of life. I needed to pursue Five Element medicine, because it was in this medicine that I found inspiration and spirit. I also needed a community of support as most of my former friendships and relationships stopped being relevant to the person I was becoming. I needed a cooler climate, expansive vistas, clear streams, and a clearly delineated autumn season. The school in the mile high state of Colorado held a deep presence of the metal element in its most grand expression of the Mountain scape. Newly inspired – my life on the Island became enjoyable again. I loved each day. The familiar beaches, forests, and vistas which had been my prison for 8 months became instead a wonderland of restful and joyful abundance. I once again could enjoy Hawaii for its primitive and untarnished beauty. With the promise of a new possibility, the knowledge of what I needed, and a new found wisdom in what was necessary to attain it, I was renewed and capable and made the move.
Since that time my life has turned more vital, awake, filled with newness and motivation. Since moving to Colorado I’ve been hiking, going to the gym, studying, making new friends and contacts, and thoroughly enjoying the mountains with the freshly awed eyes of a newborn each time I lay eyes on them. I have found my home and the community I need to support me in the years to come. Renewed, the Metal element lets go of the past, enables a symbolic death and the rebirth through the infinite sea of potential found in the water element to a new, inspired and joyful life.
I have found a place that supports my deficient Metal element and brings me back towards a more centered space. Now that I’m back in Kona sitting under a kukui nut tree on the beach looking at the roiling waves before me, I’m curious what new knowledge and wisdom my time here will offer…
1/11/10 – Breezes in Kona
To look at environmental conditions of wind, heat, humidity, dryness, and dampness is a key to understanding the motivational imperatives of each of the elements. I’m not sure I’m fully present to all the implications, but wind become more clear today in observation of its effects on trees and water.
Wind is the energy of change, of movement and of motivation (a condition of being moved). Wind is the energy that animates and gives birth to all ideas in terms of the journey from A to B. It creates the game of life embodied in the notion of “its better over there than it is over here”.
Without wind, the surface of the ocean would have no motion and would be clear, calm, and non-erosive, having no directionality.
I see that there are two distinct realms of existence for water. The deep Yin existence and represented by the depths of currents and pressures deep below the surface. The churning of waves, of surf and foam exemplifying water’s chaotic nature, represents the shallow Yang existence.
I see the split nature of Yang Water (Bladder) and Yin Water (Kidneys) as being personified in the movement of Waves (Yang), and Currents (Yin). Currents are controlled by their own willful purpose and are unaffected by much other than their own weight and gravity. Waves, however, are very much affected Wind and the energy of change.
In the same way as change has us be vigilant and responsive to threats and changes taking place in real time which is most akin to the Bladder meridian which represents the nervous system – a system designed to process and respond to changes, and potential dangers by responding directly and immediately to any contact with change. The deep waters, however, are not as concerned with responding to change as they are willful to their own directionality and are not affected by external conditions.
In terms of relationship to Wood and creation of new ideas, wind gives us directionality. Without a particular course to take in life the potential of our willpower is never directed in any specific direction and all our energies are contained. No wind, no movement, no direction. Without wind, Fire would never spread. In the same way our warmth would never spread and our passions would never be ignited from our embers to move out to others. The Earth would never be cleaned as the Fires would never rage across it, and seeds would never be pollinated and no fragrance of what is nourishing would ever drift before us to entice our appetites to life. In the same way our minds would never have any new food to integrate, nothing fresh, and nothing nourishing. No wind and our air would never be refreshed, the trees would not be cleaned of old growth and no room would be made for the new. The Winds of change remind us that nothing is permanent and that all passes on and nothing stays the same. Without this energy Birth and Change, nothing would have motion.
Stagnation is the worst thing that can happen to us. Without wind to create change, we would be inert, lifeless, directionless, overly contained, barren, uninspiring, and completely untapped. Trapped in a rut we’d be repeating the same patterns, or we’d be inert in our inaction.
The greater the wind, the greater the change. Trees snap, fires rage, and the earth is stripped of its nourishment, all that is valued is blow away and scattered. Wind is also the energy of stress and if we are not supply, we can snap against it easily.
I watched the breeze come into Kona today and clear the air and gently stroke the trees. In animating the trees they revealed their flexibility and beauty in their dance with change.
Wind is the energy of change, of movement and of motivation (a condition of being moved). Wind is the energy that animates and gives birth to all ideas in terms of the journey from A to B. It creates the game of life embodied in the notion of “its better over there than it is over here”.
Without wind, the surface of the ocean would have no motion and would be clear, calm, and non-erosive, having no directionality.
I see that there are two distinct realms of existence for water. The deep Yin existence and represented by the depths of currents and pressures deep below the surface. The churning of waves, of surf and foam exemplifying water’s chaotic nature, represents the shallow Yang existence.
I see the split nature of Yang Water (Bladder) and Yin Water (Kidneys) as being personified in the movement of Waves (Yang), and Currents (Yin). Currents are controlled by their own willful purpose and are unaffected by much other than their own weight and gravity. Waves, however, are very much affected Wind and the energy of change.
In the same way as change has us be vigilant and responsive to threats and changes taking place in real time which is most akin to the Bladder meridian which represents the nervous system – a system designed to process and respond to changes, and potential dangers by responding directly and immediately to any contact with change. The deep waters, however, are not as concerned with responding to change as they are willful to their own directionality and are not affected by external conditions.
In terms of relationship to Wood and creation of new ideas, wind gives us directionality. Without a particular course to take in life the potential of our willpower is never directed in any specific direction and all our energies are contained. No wind, no movement, no direction. Without wind, Fire would never spread. In the same way our warmth would never spread and our passions would never be ignited from our embers to move out to others. The Earth would never be cleaned as the Fires would never rage across it, and seeds would never be pollinated and no fragrance of what is nourishing would ever drift before us to entice our appetites to life. In the same way our minds would never have any new food to integrate, nothing fresh, and nothing nourishing. No wind and our air would never be refreshed, the trees would not be cleaned of old growth and no room would be made for the new. The Winds of change remind us that nothing is permanent and that all passes on and nothing stays the same. Without this energy Birth and Change, nothing would have motion.
Stagnation is the worst thing that can happen to us. Without wind to create change, we would be inert, lifeless, directionless, overly contained, barren, uninspiring, and completely untapped. Trapped in a rut we’d be repeating the same patterns, or we’d be inert in our inaction.
The greater the wind, the greater the change. Trees snap, fires rage, and the earth is stripped of its nourishment, all that is valued is blow away and scattered. Wind is also the energy of stress and if we are not supply, we can snap against it easily.
I watched the breeze come into Kona today and clear the air and gently stroke the trees. In animating the trees they revealed their flexibility and beauty in their dance with change.
1/08/10 – Kailua-Kona
I’m in Kona for 35 days and the trade winds have started clearing the volcanic smog away from the slopes of Hualalai to reveal the shape of the land. The Hawaiian islands are as enchanting as nature gets. The Big Island of Hawaii exhibits 18 of the world’s 21 climates and includes deserts, rain forests and glacial tundras.
The climate overall is a vivid example of the meeting place of Fire and Water as the volcanic lands of boiled metal rise through the sea to give place for plants to take root and begin the cycle of new birth. The islands are ancient but are being terraformed at an exceptionally fast rate. I wish I had the time to document all I can learn from this place. Each day will bring new insights as I travel through the 18 climates of this strange and wonderful land.
There is an ancient respect that the native Hawaiians have for the islands and the recognition of the value the land provides for its people. As the most remote island chain from a major land mass in the world, the miracle of its existence is deeply respected here. The sea is recognized as a huge resource and much of the economy is centered around fishing and water sports. Hawaiians always test their fears of water through surfing 20-40ft waves and swimming with the sharks. The sea is feared, respected, honored and nurtured.
My first impression is how Fire predominates the island chain as a whole. The people are warm, friendly, open, intimate and joyful. The importance of family to the native Hawaiians is not to be underestimated. Most are content with waking up in the morning and heading to the beach with a cooler to spend the day surfing and playing the ukulele till the evening bonfires bring people together in song and drumming into the night. The Earth element is also richly present. There is a constant air of celebration to this place and of thankfulness for the friends and family you have around you. Everyone looks after everybody else and reciprocity, fairness and mutual support is a reflection of the complete balance of a closed and self-maintaining ecosystem.
Despite the rich rain forests of the windward facing side of each of the islands, Wood energy doesn’t manifest itself as explicitly in the island’s people. People are not future oriented, are not as concerned with creating plans, but are content to simply be in eachother’s nurturing presence. The Metal element is also very strong here. There is a deep respect for the value of the land, of each other and of each rock, grain of sand and leaf of every tree. The volcanic metals give essence to the many plants that thrive here and the Hawaiian people permit and encourage all forms of self-expression and freedom, so long as the land is respected. Many artists, healers, musicians and entertainers live here and the clothing is vibrant, colorful, and bordering on gaudy. Warmth, sexuality and juiciness pervade the culture. It is very educational to watch the sun-deprived, dazed and confused tourists come in and out of this strange land caught like deer in headlights unable to fully take anything as they avoid showing more skin than they think appropriate, and take cover in the shade for fear of their white flesh being smitten by an unfamiliar rosy glow.
Two types of climates tend to predominate. The Western side of the island is dry, arid, and desert like, while the East is steamy, wet, moist, richly green, and opulent in plant life where the Water element tends to predominate. The Fire element predominates on the Western side with is where the beaches team with celebration and togetherness. The Eastern people are more oriented towards hard work and labor. People are more secluded and rely on more reclusive and quiet familial togetherness. There is a secretiveness to the Eastern side and its people. Industry of all kinds tends to predominate from fishing to construction services. The Kahuna sorcerers tend to live on the wet side of the island where the mysteries of the Metal and Water, death, and rebirth from a sea of potential predominates their pursuit of medicinal plants from the rainforests.
The plantlife on the Western side is shorter, stubby, compact, barky, thick-leaved, and oriented towards the conservation of water. The leaves and branches are fewer, but the plants are sturdier and more resistant to the sun that’s beating down on them with no restraint and no promise of rain. The plants are resilient, conserve their resources, and more brittle, and attuned to the fewest possible plans necessary to get the job done. This type of growth reminds me of more rigid, stronger personalities oriented towards more conservative use of resources, and surviving through the competition for resources. Their plans are firm, strong, unbreakable, and stand the test of time and will persevere despite harsh conditions.
In contrast the plantlife on the Eastern side is lush, large, expansive, varied in color, more fragile, and opulent. The plants here tend to express more creativity in their flowers, leaf organizations, fruit qualities, and patterns. The Water element is so available here that there is little fear for starvation and growth can expand in all directions unabated. The plant life is so thick that it almost tends to choke itself. Unlike the Western side of the island, there is less competition for resources here. When we have ample resources we do tend to be more carefree in our self-expression and our planning is no longer conservative. If we have time, money and contacts we can spread our wings wide in any direction we choose, unencumbered by the constraint imposed by scarcity.
The climate overall is a vivid example of the meeting place of Fire and Water as the volcanic lands of boiled metal rise through the sea to give place for plants to take root and begin the cycle of new birth. The islands are ancient but are being terraformed at an exceptionally fast rate. I wish I had the time to document all I can learn from this place. Each day will bring new insights as I travel through the 18 climates of this strange and wonderful land.
There is an ancient respect that the native Hawaiians have for the islands and the recognition of the value the land provides for its people. As the most remote island chain from a major land mass in the world, the miracle of its existence is deeply respected here. The sea is recognized as a huge resource and much of the economy is centered around fishing and water sports. Hawaiians always test their fears of water through surfing 20-40ft waves and swimming with the sharks. The sea is feared, respected, honored and nurtured.
My first impression is how Fire predominates the island chain as a whole. The people are warm, friendly, open, intimate and joyful. The importance of family to the native Hawaiians is not to be underestimated. Most are content with waking up in the morning and heading to the beach with a cooler to spend the day surfing and playing the ukulele till the evening bonfires bring people together in song and drumming into the night. The Earth element is also richly present. There is a constant air of celebration to this place and of thankfulness for the friends and family you have around you. Everyone looks after everybody else and reciprocity, fairness and mutual support is a reflection of the complete balance of a closed and self-maintaining ecosystem.
Despite the rich rain forests of the windward facing side of each of the islands, Wood energy doesn’t manifest itself as explicitly in the island’s people. People are not future oriented, are not as concerned with creating plans, but are content to simply be in eachother’s nurturing presence. The Metal element is also very strong here. There is a deep respect for the value of the land, of each other and of each rock, grain of sand and leaf of every tree. The volcanic metals give essence to the many plants that thrive here and the Hawaiian people permit and encourage all forms of self-expression and freedom, so long as the land is respected. Many artists, healers, musicians and entertainers live here and the clothing is vibrant, colorful, and bordering on gaudy. Warmth, sexuality and juiciness pervade the culture. It is very educational to watch the sun-deprived, dazed and confused tourists come in and out of this strange land caught like deer in headlights unable to fully take anything as they avoid showing more skin than they think appropriate, and take cover in the shade for fear of their white flesh being smitten by an unfamiliar rosy glow.
Two types of climates tend to predominate. The Western side of the island is dry, arid, and desert like, while the East is steamy, wet, moist, richly green, and opulent in plant life where the Water element tends to predominate. The Fire element predominates on the Western side with is where the beaches team with celebration and togetherness. The Eastern people are more oriented towards hard work and labor. People are more secluded and rely on more reclusive and quiet familial togetherness. There is a secretiveness to the Eastern side and its people. Industry of all kinds tends to predominate from fishing to construction services. The Kahuna sorcerers tend to live on the wet side of the island where the mysteries of the Metal and Water, death, and rebirth from a sea of potential predominates their pursuit of medicinal plants from the rainforests.
The plantlife on the Western side is shorter, stubby, compact, barky, thick-leaved, and oriented towards the conservation of water. The leaves and branches are fewer, but the plants are sturdier and more resistant to the sun that’s beating down on them with no restraint and no promise of rain. The plants are resilient, conserve their resources, and more brittle, and attuned to the fewest possible plans necessary to get the job done. This type of growth reminds me of more rigid, stronger personalities oriented towards more conservative use of resources, and surviving through the competition for resources. Their plans are firm, strong, unbreakable, and stand the test of time and will persevere despite harsh conditions.
In contrast the plantlife on the Eastern side is lush, large, expansive, varied in color, more fragile, and opulent. The plants here tend to express more creativity in their flowers, leaf organizations, fruit qualities, and patterns. The Water element is so available here that there is little fear for starvation and growth can expand in all directions unabated. The plant life is so thick that it almost tends to choke itself. Unlike the Western side of the island, there is less competition for resources here. When we have ample resources we do tend to be more carefree in our self-expression and our planning is no longer conservative. If we have time, money and contacts we can spread our wings wide in any direction we choose, unencumbered by the constraint imposed by scarcity.
12/22/09 – Lessons from the River
I went on a hike to my favorite river in Maryland which is located 20 minutes drive from my parents’ house. I noticed how all the trees reach to the source (Water). All their roots grounded in what resources are available, while their branches reach down for the source of potential.
The river is flooded from all the snow melt. With is roiling waters it is murky and unclear. When our flow isn’t restrained but we must above all costs reach our destination with speed, we can be murky and unclear in explaining our intentions to others for fear of possibly being derailed from our path.
There is no wind today. The trees are yin and the waters are yang. The trees are in quiet contemplation over the roiling waters, unconcerned over what goes on below and only concerned over their own plans. Wood can be quite single minded its own ideas and can fail to consider what is going on around it.
Water goes down to total yin, away from Heaven, towards depth. It is pulled up by the Yang of Wood to manifest as life. The energy of water finds the path of least resistance, whereas wood grows up through resistance. There seems to be an urgency to water until it reaches its depth. Whatever amount of gravity is allowed to it, it will take it. You give a water constitution person a foot, and they will take a mile. This is not so with wood. Wood will grow in its own time and in proportion to its season and chosen plan. It will push through obstacles that stand in its way, whereas water will simply move around the next obstacle without any direct confrontation until it has found its resting place.
As the snow melts the ground is waterlogged and even the earth cannot exert its controlling power over it. When our minds are flooded we often have difficulty feeling grounded and contained. Our boundaries become meaningless as we overcome everyone with the force of our will. The melt takes all the nutrients away and washes them out. Having no time to seep deep into the soil, our reserves are never contained, are squandered and are washed away by whatever latest flood or catastrophe has taken over our lives.
The river was like an unleashed torrent – raging, roaring, and forcing its way against the rocks that say in the middle of the river. Once the obstacle was overcome, the river once again become peaceful and unencumbered from its low. The water roils in possibilities of different directions, trying to find the path of least resistance. Yet it is still determined in its path. The boundaries created by the rocks are still, watchful and seemingly unassaulted by the danger rolling around them. They quietly guide the raging river down towards their destiny. Anything less solid than the self-assured rock would be in grave danger if you got in the way of the water. Still, water has a way of wearing you down over time.
If we’re overflowing like a raging river, everything is pummeled and beaten. Our judgement and discrimination is murky, unruly, unfocused, and unclear. We will go where we want regardless of what or who is in our way. Our thoughts flow, and flow, and flow into every corner of our mind as we’re unable to contain ourselves and take rash actions in the face of dangers or obstacles. Fantasy and reality intermingle as our nervous system keeps us on constant alert.
The waves and ripples on the surface of the river illustrate the changing state between activity and inactivity, of advance and withdrawl, gathering in and rushing forth. The wisdom of the timing and knowing of when it is appropriate to withdraw and when it is appropriate to move forward is innate in the water element. Only when we cultivate this wisdom in ourselves will we not be squandering our resources when it's inappropriate to move forward, or when we do not have enough strength.
The qualities of movement of a stream and of a river are quite different. The smaller the body of water, the lighter the sound, the gentler the flow. Less effort on the part of plants and animals needs to be risked to tap into its flow. There is less to risk, and less to lose. When our resources are low our ability to sustain life is weak. When our rivers are wide and full, all of nature thrives at our riverbanks. People are attracted to those who have power, money, and skill.
Life gathers to the river much like people gather to the resources of others for security and ‘ability’. Ability and money are the highest prized possessions. He who has spiritual, mental, and financial resources becomes the focus of everyone’s attention. And he who has access to resources ‘wins’. Wars are fought over resources. This is the unstoppable and primal will and instinct of nature towards self-preservation. All skills are born out of this element. They are currencies of exchange. Nature competes constantly for the best pool of resources. Trees strangle other trees, one pack of lions will drive out another pack of lions from the watering hole, and if the lions are hungry all they need to do is hang out around the watering holes until their prey is thirsty. He’s who’s strongest, fastest, most clever, and conniving wins.
As a culture we do not know what it takes to bring all the food and abundance into our grocery stores and all the services and products we take for granted. We’ve lost the ability to truly know how to struggle for our own survival when everything has been catered for us. As a result, we squander the resources we have because we never appreciate what it took to acquire them. Someone’s blood, sweat, and tears toiled the land, irrigated the plants, and picked their fruit to bring the food to the table. The huge expenditure of resources to bring food from farm to fork is hidden in the spread-out cost of a few bucks it took to buy the ingredients at the store.
We go to work to expend our water (resources: time, energy), to turn it into water (resources: money), so we can secure our existence (resources: food, sleep, vacation time). Majority of our life is in transacting our internal water for the internal water of others and of the waters of the land.
In our culture of getting and acquisition we see how the same story line of nature is repeated in the reality TV shows all focused at the acquisition of money, beauty, power, notoriety, material possessions, cars, iPods, houses. Everything is acquired and everything is transacted. The same game of getting hasn’t fundamentally changed since the dawn of time.
Our bladder is the manifestation of the frenetic energy which we direct towards the acquisition of external resources as we interact with the world. The meridian runs from the eyes which see the object of our desire and flows down to the feet which giving us the ability to stand erect and move forward towards what we’ve seen as the goal of our pursuit. It is our longest meridian, irrigating our whole being with the energy necessary to go and get our potential.
Likewise the kidney is the manifestation of our deep reserves what are most precious and worth protecting in us. This might be symbolized by the kidney meridian which runs down the front of our chest and abdomen and down the inside of our legs, as allowing us to curl in and protect ourselves against all potential danger should our deepest reserves be threatened.
The river is flooded from all the snow melt. With is roiling waters it is murky and unclear. When our flow isn’t restrained but we must above all costs reach our destination with speed, we can be murky and unclear in explaining our intentions to others for fear of possibly being derailed from our path.
There is no wind today. The trees are yin and the waters are yang. The trees are in quiet contemplation over the roiling waters, unconcerned over what goes on below and only concerned over their own plans. Wood can be quite single minded its own ideas and can fail to consider what is going on around it.
Water goes down to total yin, away from Heaven, towards depth. It is pulled up by the Yang of Wood to manifest as life. The energy of water finds the path of least resistance, whereas wood grows up through resistance. There seems to be an urgency to water until it reaches its depth. Whatever amount of gravity is allowed to it, it will take it. You give a water constitution person a foot, and they will take a mile. This is not so with wood. Wood will grow in its own time and in proportion to its season and chosen plan. It will push through obstacles that stand in its way, whereas water will simply move around the next obstacle without any direct confrontation until it has found its resting place.
As the snow melts the ground is waterlogged and even the earth cannot exert its controlling power over it. When our minds are flooded we often have difficulty feeling grounded and contained. Our boundaries become meaningless as we overcome everyone with the force of our will. The melt takes all the nutrients away and washes them out. Having no time to seep deep into the soil, our reserves are never contained, are squandered and are washed away by whatever latest flood or catastrophe has taken over our lives.
The river was like an unleashed torrent – raging, roaring, and forcing its way against the rocks that say in the middle of the river. Once the obstacle was overcome, the river once again become peaceful and unencumbered from its low. The water roils in possibilities of different directions, trying to find the path of least resistance. Yet it is still determined in its path. The boundaries created by the rocks are still, watchful and seemingly unassaulted by the danger rolling around them. They quietly guide the raging river down towards their destiny. Anything less solid than the self-assured rock would be in grave danger if you got in the way of the water. Still, water has a way of wearing you down over time.
If we’re overflowing like a raging river, everything is pummeled and beaten. Our judgement and discrimination is murky, unruly, unfocused, and unclear. We will go where we want regardless of what or who is in our way. Our thoughts flow, and flow, and flow into every corner of our mind as we’re unable to contain ourselves and take rash actions in the face of dangers or obstacles. Fantasy and reality intermingle as our nervous system keeps us on constant alert.
The waves and ripples on the surface of the river illustrate the changing state between activity and inactivity, of advance and withdrawl, gathering in and rushing forth. The wisdom of the timing and knowing of when it is appropriate to withdraw and when it is appropriate to move forward is innate in the water element. Only when we cultivate this wisdom in ourselves will we not be squandering our resources when it's inappropriate to move forward, or when we do not have enough strength.
The qualities of movement of a stream and of a river are quite different. The smaller the body of water, the lighter the sound, the gentler the flow. Less effort on the part of plants and animals needs to be risked to tap into its flow. There is less to risk, and less to lose. When our resources are low our ability to sustain life is weak. When our rivers are wide and full, all of nature thrives at our riverbanks. People are attracted to those who have power, money, and skill.
Life gathers to the river much like people gather to the resources of others for security and ‘ability’. Ability and money are the highest prized possessions. He who has spiritual, mental, and financial resources becomes the focus of everyone’s attention. And he who has access to resources ‘wins’. Wars are fought over resources. This is the unstoppable and primal will and instinct of nature towards self-preservation. All skills are born out of this element. They are currencies of exchange. Nature competes constantly for the best pool of resources. Trees strangle other trees, one pack of lions will drive out another pack of lions from the watering hole, and if the lions are hungry all they need to do is hang out around the watering holes until their prey is thirsty. He’s who’s strongest, fastest, most clever, and conniving wins.
As a culture we do not know what it takes to bring all the food and abundance into our grocery stores and all the services and products we take for granted. We’ve lost the ability to truly know how to struggle for our own survival when everything has been catered for us. As a result, we squander the resources we have because we never appreciate what it took to acquire them. Someone’s blood, sweat, and tears toiled the land, irrigated the plants, and picked their fruit to bring the food to the table. The huge expenditure of resources to bring food from farm to fork is hidden in the spread-out cost of a few bucks it took to buy the ingredients at the store.
We go to work to expend our water (resources: time, energy), to turn it into water (resources: money), so we can secure our existence (resources: food, sleep, vacation time). Majority of our life is in transacting our internal water for the internal water of others and of the waters of the land.
In our culture of getting and acquisition we see how the same story line of nature is repeated in the reality TV shows all focused at the acquisition of money, beauty, power, notoriety, material possessions, cars, iPods, houses. Everything is acquired and everything is transacted. The same game of getting hasn’t fundamentally changed since the dawn of time.
Our bladder is the manifestation of the frenetic energy which we direct towards the acquisition of external resources as we interact with the world. The meridian runs from the eyes which see the object of our desire and flows down to the feet which giving us the ability to stand erect and move forward towards what we’ve seen as the goal of our pursuit. It is our longest meridian, irrigating our whole being with the energy necessary to go and get our potential.
Likewise the kidney is the manifestation of our deep reserves what are most precious and worth protecting in us. This might be symbolized by the kidney meridian which runs down the front of our chest and abdomen and down the inside of our legs, as allowing us to curl in and protect ourselves against all potential danger should our deepest reserves be threatened.
Irony and Re-incarnation...
The subtitle to "The zen you find on top of mountains is the zen you bring up there", and my subtext "... but choosing a good mountain helps" is ultimately ironic. I had chosen the volcanic mountain of Hawaii, but it turned out the mountain I was really seeking was that of Colorado. Perhaps my life will consist of traveling between mountains - if for no other reason than to change my point of view.
My family mentioned that they felt disappointed that I had stopped blogging since I had moved to Colorado. I realized that I had no answer for why this was. A friend stated "The moment you stopped blogging was the moment I knew that you were happy". In that startling and incisive insight she revealed the reality of what this blog had largely consisted of: a venue for online therapy and the communication of the angst associated with the pursuit of a destiny for myself which began when I set foot on the islands of Hawaii.
When I moved to Colorado the quest had ended and with it my reason for writing. To my family and friends: I am happy. I love where I live. I love what I'm doing. Thank you for concerns, your best wishes, and support. I am so grateful to all you've given to support me on my journey through my dark time of confusion and uncertainty.
As the old intention passes into the void, my new intention for this blog is for it to reincarnate as a journal of my insights into the nature of the Five Elements, as part of the fulfillment of my studies.
Namaste
My family mentioned that they felt disappointed that I had stopped blogging since I had moved to Colorado. I realized that I had no answer for why this was. A friend stated "The moment you stopped blogging was the moment I knew that you were happy". In that startling and incisive insight she revealed the reality of what this blog had largely consisted of: a venue for online therapy and the communication of the angst associated with the pursuit of a destiny for myself which began when I set foot on the islands of Hawaii.
When I moved to Colorado the quest had ended and with it my reason for writing. To my family and friends: I am happy. I love where I live. I love what I'm doing. Thank you for concerns, your best wishes, and support. I am so grateful to all you've given to support me on my journey through my dark time of confusion and uncertainty.
As the old intention passes into the void, my new intention for this blog is for it to reincarnate as a journal of my insights into the nature of the Five Elements, as part of the fulfillment of my studies.
Namaste
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